Gallery performance

First let me say we love Gallery and been using it for years. But for years every time we post a new gallery and let our users know about it Gallery pretty much takes over our server. The load sometimes jumps to as much as 50 or more. We had hoped the new gallery 3.0 would fix it but it is pretty much the same so I am going to assume it is a problem with the config and perhaps the php config. Could someone share with us a config for a fairly large site (100K users, 40K photos in gallery)? Thanks so much in advance.